


Sex Pollen in the FBI

by Jacinta



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Drinking Games, Mildly Dubious Consent, Multi, Orgy, Sex Pollen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-02-18
Updated: 2014-02-18
Packaged: 2018-01-12 22:46:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 5,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1203322
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jacinta/pseuds/Jacinta
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The BAU has a Christmas party but one person wants it to be more than the awkward interaction expected and doses everyone with a special drug. Thankfully the team left the party in time to keep their loss of control a little more private.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Sex Pollen in the FBI

**Author's Note:**

> Again this is one of those 'I was moving house' fics that I've had sitting in a notebook for months because I'm a lazy little thing that hates typing up my own works. However I eventually get around to these things so here! Enjoy some smut.
> 
> Oh and please note that the drug is meant to be subtle, so when mixed with alcohol it would seem like a really bad decision made whilst drunk if the unsub didn't get caught in his own web of awkward sex.

Reid sighed and leant against the warm form of Morgan as Rossi drove them to his place to continue the party that they left at the office. Spencer had allowed himself to drink more than normal as Morgan passed him drinks at the BAU Christmas party and now he was feeling it. Normally they didn’t do this sort of thing, either called out by necessity or enjoying the night with family but tonight wasn't actually Christmas so everyone had decided to go. Reid was now starting to think that may have been a bad idea.

"You okay pretty boy?" Morgan asked making Reid smile.

"Do you mean it?" Reid asked and Rossi snorted.

"Mean what?" Morgan asked entertaining the drunk man.

"That I'm pretty. You always call me that. Derek, you know I won't have you or anything if you’re gay." Spencer slurred slightly as Rossi failed to hold the chuckle in, let it lose with a jab for Morgan to answer the mess of sentence.

"Reid, you are drunk and - hot."

"If that's what you like." Rossi snarked.

"Thank you, you’re hot too." Reid said.

"No, I meant that you draping yourself over me is boiling. Your temperature is way up." Morgan complained pushing Reid upright as they pulled into the driveway.

"Oh good, the others are here so I don't have to listen to this." Rossi announced. Morgan helped Reid out of the car as Reid took every opportunity to touch Morgan as he could manage which made walking a challenge.

"Let's play a game!" Reid shouted as Morgan rushed him through the door and leant him against JJ who he hugged loosely. "A normal person game not a painful one."

"Anything in mind?" Hotch asked dryly amused by his antics.

"Never have I ever." Garcia suggested excitedly clapping. Morgan shrugged in agreement.

"Rossi, get us something to do shots with." Blake asked as everyone gathered around a table, decision made.

"I think Reid is drunk enough." Hotch pointed out always protecting his team.

"I'm fine, I am barely intoxicated." Reid defended and he managed not to slur anything.

"See? He said a big word." JJ said as though it solved the matter. Rossi frowned and shook his head agreeing with Hotch.

“If we drink much more we’re all going to pass out on the floor and regret this tomorrow.” Hotch offered the convincing argument.

"Okay, add a rule. You can drink or do a dare." Garcia offered.

"That actually sounds fun baby girl." Morgan agreed and Hotch nodded approval so Rossi rolled his eyes and left to water down a bottle of flavoured vodka he'd been given at some point by some idiot who clearly didn’t know him at all.

 

"Flavoured vodka for you lot and this is for me." Rossi held something he’d pulled off his bottom shelf; it’s not like he would drink a lot or really taste it being already about tipsy. Hotch filled the shot glasses and claimed some of Rossi’s choice.

"Drink or dare chosen by questioner if you've done the thing." Garcia explained quickly before starting the game. "Never have I been tied up and we are talking kinky not unsubby." She started and JJ and Hotch drank.

"Dare please."Reid said and everyone looked between him and Hotch.

"Boss man, handcuff Reid's hands behind him unless they are needed again." Garcia ordered and Reid helpfully placed his hands behind his head for Hotch to pull down into the cuffs. Once his second wrist was secure Reid stumbled backwards, accidentally groping Hotch and falling onto the floor when Hotch jumped back in surprise.

"Never have I ever had a one night stand." Blake said once the two were successfully seated again and Rossi, JJ and Morgan drank.

"Define please." Reid asked and Blake stared.

"Someone you barely know and have sex with and never intend to see again." Morgan sighed in exasperation.

"I supposed I need a dare now." He mused and got several yells to explain. "We had dinner and had sex; it wasn't in this state so it was a one off." Reid explained.

"Right. Let JJ undo some buttons." Blake nudged her friend who giggled but moved around the table to undo the buttons of Spencer's vest and about half of his shirt. Reid sat still as she worked.

"Never have I been on the receiving end of penetrative sex." Hotch smiled as all the girls drank, Reid kindly taking a drink rather than make Hotch balance fun against sexual harassment seminars. He leant forward and took the cup between his lips, throwing his head back and swallowing before putting the glass back down.

“That was somewhat impressive.” Hotch noted and Reid smiled shyly.

"Never have I ever gone past kissing with someone of the same gender." JJ offered. Garcia, Rossi, Morgan and Blake drank.

"Dare." Reid announced.

"Give Hotch a taste, straddle his lap and use tongue." JJ said looking to Hotch to make sure he was okay with it.

"Feel free to not though." Hotch said awkwardly. Reid moved around the table and straddled his lap to grind down with a smile. He started to fall backwards making Hotch reach out to catch him instinctively wrapping his arms around the smaller body and distracting him from the tongue that was now in his mouth. Slightly dazed Hotch kissed back, only realising when his hand slid to cradle Reid's head.

"Fuck." Reid panted staring at him. "I much prefer that to shaking hands." Reid assessed producing laughs as Hotch reluctantly helped him off and back to his own chair.

"Never have I gone past normal PDAs in public." Rossi offered and Blake, and Morgan drank.

“Do cars on deserted roads count as public?” Garcia asked and Rossi shook his head not needing that bit of information.

"Good thing I'm not drinking." Reid said and Rossi stared.

"In that case I dare you to kiss me and tell me what you did." Rossi said and Reid leant in and letting Rossi take control but still making the man moan. "I see why Hotch is going into shock." Rossi told the others and Hotch made a sound in protest.

"An ex was an exhibitionist so we went to a lot of clubs and did other things on stages. Also once in a lecture hall, during the lecture of course.” Reid smirked and Morgan whooped. “Never have I ever been blindfolded." Reid said and everyone else downed a drink. "Really?"

"Never have I ever been to a strip club." Morgan said and JJ and Garcia drank.

"Excluding when it was for cases I assume?" Rossi checked and Morgan nodded.

"Uh, dare. I grew up in Vegas." Reid said to the looks "I had friends in there and then I did work very briefly in one.”

"Take your shirt off and did you work as a dancer?" Morgan smiled and Hotch threw the handcuff keys to Rossi who undid the rest of the buttons before sliding the layers off and recuffing Reid.

“Yes, I was a dancer. I was seventeen and needed money desperately because my scholarship wasn’t enough to support mum and myself and I was in serious trouble.” Reid shrugged. “It was more fun than I expected but once I could I quit.”

"Never have I ever been spanked." Garcia said to get away from depressing thoughts and no one reached for their glass. "Really, no one?" She pouted and went to reach for her own glass.

"Uh, I have." Reid ducked his head and Garcia smiled.

"And what did young Dr Reid think of it?" She asked.

"I can't believe none of you noticed that I barely sat down for an entire case." Reid teased and Morgan cursed.

"Then I dare you to lay your pretty butt across Hotch or Rossi's lap and take five." Garcia instructed and Reid looked between the two.

"Why not both?" Reid asked dropping a few jaws. ”Could take more than five each.” He added with a pout and Rossi pushed his chair back and gestured to the table. Reid lay his chest on the table and spread his legs.

"Mind if I pull the padding down?" Rossi asked and Reid shook his head, biting his lip to prevent a moan as Rossi undid his belt and pulled down his pants.

"One, thank you Sir!" Reid yelped at the first unexpected strike. "Two, thank you Sir!" He quickly added three and four. "Five, thank you Sir. May I have another round please?" Reid finished looking to Hotch pleadingly.

"Don't count though." Hotch asked and Reid nodded. Hotch stood and took Rossi's place behind Reid. This was awkward but Reid clearly had enjoyed Rossi doing it. Hotch swung his hand producing a whimper.

"You okay?" Hotch asked anxiously.

"Yes. That was a good whimper." Reid explained and Garcia giggled so Hotch continued. Reid made a sound after each one and didn't straighten until Hotch helped him.

"Someone else should join me in the dare world." Reid said kicking his pants off.

"Well I have never had sex against a wall." Blake said and everyone but Morgan and Reid took a drink.

"Dare me." Morgan said and Reid echoed.

"Alight boys. I dare one of you to give the other head until JJ has had her turn." Blake said and Reid was under the table before she finished.

"Want some help there?" Morgan asked when the muffled sounds of Reid complaining under his breath was heard. The answer was clearly no because a second later Morgan groaned, eyes closing in the manner of a man not entirely expecting a mouth around their cock.

"Fuck, Spencer!" Morgan gasped and they heard a little chuckle.

"I've never used a sex toy on myself or someone else." Hotch offered and everyone but Morgan drank, Rossi rather sheepishly. Morgan shouted and everyone stared at him.

"He bit my thigh; I would suggest that means he has, which at this point isn't a surprise." Morgan bit his lip and grunted to smother the curse as Reid confirmed with another bite.

"Suggestions?" Hotch asked and Garcia whispered to Blake when past the message on. Derek moaned twice during this message relay.

"I dare you to lay on the table to be touched." Hotch said and Reid moaned sending vibrations through Morgan who slid a hand under the table and Reid moaned again.

"Never have I ever been in a threesome." JJ admitted and Hotch and Blake neglected their drinks. A yelp from Morgan indicated Reid wanted a dare. "I dare you to tell us when the hell you did all this." JJ demanded and they all laughed at Morgan's groan of disappointment when Reid pulled his month away.

"I don't understand what you’re asking." Reid questioned as Morgan and Rossi helped out from under the table and onto it.

"When did you do all this kinky stuff? You don't seem the type." JJ clarified.

"I started at the same age as everyone else; it was college instead of high school for me though. I occasionally work for a BDSM Club, have since I was legal. Though now it’s for fun more than money, it’s much better than working as a stripper." Reid explained.

"When did you first have sex?" JJ asked.

"I was fourteen and my supervisor invited me over for dinner, his wife had her hand on my thigh the whole time. I asked if he invited me over in the hope of seducing me and you can imagine the rest." Reid smiled at the memory. "I occasionally was invited to their bed until I left for the FBI."

"Never have I been part of an orgy." Rossi continued the game, giving Reid a chance to escape the questions.

"Wait. You were fourteen! How old was he?" Morgan demanded angrily.

"He was thirty-three and his wife was thirty-one. I always dictated the limits and he never pushed them." Reid assured patiently. “They would never have hurt me and I would have avoided them if I didn’t feel completely safe with them, occasionally I turned them down and sometimes they turned me down when they could tell I wasn’t thinking rationally.”

"Hello? Anyone drinking?" Rossi asked.

"Dare." Reid gasped as Garcia palmed his cock. "I also have a suggestion for a new game."

"I dare you to let someone finger you." Rossi said and Reid nodded.

"Please, let’s drop the formality and just start the orgy." Reid asked spreading his legs out as much as he could. "Fuck me, please."

"Reid!" Hotch admonished.

"Come on Hotch! Stop denying yourself just because of some stupid rules. None of us will tell, this can be a team building exercise." Reid suggested.

"One time thing?" Garcia suggested angelically.

"You know me Aaron." Rossi smiled, hand creeping possessively over Reid's torso.

"Okay. I'll leave and pretend I didn't see this." Hotch stood up.

"Hotch, I want you to fuck me stupid which is going to be quite a challenge." Reid moaned desperately.

"You can leave if you truly want but please, don't leave out of some misguided sense of duty." Blake said quietly undoing her top.

"Yeah Hotch. Everyone's considered a scenario involving you and your desk, and then we remind ourselves that you’re straight, married or dating and our boss." JJ added.

"Be Aaron instead of Supervisory Special Agent Aaron Hotchner." Morgan said and Hotch stared at them warring with himself. He should leave, but he wanted to stay. There were rules and he was in charge but Spencer looked so fucking good on the table begging with his eyes for him.

 

Decision made he leant down and kissed Reid who moaned bucking his hips up into Garcia's palm. Morgan pulled his shirt off, slipping behind Hotch to undo his. When Hotch relinquished his mouth Reid was pulled off the table by Rossi who reached to undo the handcuffs.

"You don't have to." Reid whispered and Rossi looked at him carefully.

"Votes for Reid to stay cuffed?" He called and got a moan from Garcia and JJ who were undressing with the help of Blake. "Use your words ladies." Rossi called.

"I want those long fingers in me." Garcia translated.

"But he looks good with them on." JJ argued. They looked to Hotch who was almost fighting with Morgan as they tore each other’s clothes off. Rossi made a sound in the back of his throat and uncuffed Reid and began a procession to his bedroom, pushing Reid and kind of tugging Morgan and Hotch along behind him.

Rossi pulled a box of condoms out of a drawer, followed by lube. "Before you ask I was a boy scout, and tense trips to drug stores are not fun." He told them. “Red, yellow, green system too, just in case.” He added as an afterthought.

“Requests?” Morgan asked always thinking of his partner or partners, it was always easier if people just stated what they wanted and you either agreed or turned it down. They were all touching each other but stalling, as though they weren’t ready to actually go past the point of plausible deniability.

“Be rough.” Reid purred. “Hold me down and don’t hold back at all.” He fell backwards onto the bed and spread his legs obscenely and stretched his arms above his head. Garcia dated to the other side of the bed.

“Up, hands and knees.” She demanded and Reid rolled moving into position as asked, dropping down to his elbows to kiss and caress her foot moving slowly up. Morgan quickly joined him, working slowly up the other leg while Rossi coated his fingers and teased Reid’s entrance. Hotch found himself being pushed backwards onto the bed next to Reid with Blake crawling up to kneel over his face and lean over to steal Garcia’s pleasured sounds with a kiss and JJ pushed his legs apart so she could crawl between them.

“Dave.” Reid whimpered clearly impatient which only made Rossi chuckled and spank him. Hotch made a similar complaint when JJ licked up from his knee and then started peppering little bites and kisses along his hips. Rossi slowly pressed the single digit into Reid who tried to push back but Rossi held his hips still.

“Patience Reid.” The older man scolded and Reid growled in frustration and moved one hand to touch himself but Morgan intercepted the hand and guided it to Penelope’s thigh.

“She wanted your fingers.” He informed the genius who lightly trailed his fingertips over the sensitive skin. Hotch groaned as JJ engulfed the head of his cock, one hand between her legs and one holding his hips down lightly. Morgan helped Garcia wriggle a bit closer and moved one of her legs around Reid’s slim shoulders effectively trapping him in his current position. Reid stopped teasing and slid two fingers into her, lightly tracing patterns down her thigh and she bucked up into him with a shout when he finally flicked his tongue over her clit.

Alex finally relinquished Penelope’s mouth to Derek and grasped Hotch’s short hair, humming happily when he stopped being timid and let his fingers clench into her thighs hard enough to bruise. JJ had to move both her hands to hold Hotch’s hips down, yelping in surprise when two thicker fingers replaced hers and she pulled her head up to look at Rossi who smirked and began teasing Reid with a second finger.

“Rossi I swear to god if you don’t hurry up I’ll do it myself.” Reid hissed before enthusiastically returning to his task as Rossi pushed a second finger in and moved them gently. JJ moaned and the sound Hotch made could only be described as a whimper as his fingers twitched against Blake’s thighs. Morgan parted from Garcia and trailed fingers down Blake’s back, over Hotch’s stomach and along JJ’s spine as he moved around the bed and took a condom, rolling it on.

Morgan kissed Rossi and whispered in his ear before watching as he drew his fingers out of JJ and offered him a finger which he licked and sucked with a hum. JJ wriggled her ass in the hair and pulled off Hotch, who groaned in disappointment. She looked over her shoulder and bit her lip as she saw Derek sucking Rossi’s finger and the older man licking his other one.

“Please.” She whimpered and Derek opened his eyes staring straight at her and nodded a little. When he smoothed hands down her thighs she whined and returned her attention to Hotch who moaned appreciatively and JJ made a similar sound as Derek pressed into her. “Fuck you’re big.” She panted and Garcia giggled.

Hands entwined in his hair and a leg holding his shoulders down Reid wriggled as much as he could trying to rush Rossi because he wanted to be filled. JJ’s comment had only made that desire more obvious. He redoubled his efforts on Penelope, sighing when she yelped and started to shake as she got close. Blake was moving against Hotch’s face with her head thrown back and lips parted in a perfect ‘O’ but she needed more.  

“JJ, I want to ride him.” She panted and Hotch made a sound that could be agreement but also could be disappointment that she would have to move for that. Rossi passed JJ a condom and Morgan pulled out so she could put it on quickly and move so she was lying above Hotch’s head, hand snaking above her head to clasp Penelope’s who was about to orgasm first.

Morgan sank back into JJ with a moan as Alex lowered herself onto Hotch who was gasping as his hands flew to her hips. Rossi rolled a condom onto himself and waited for Garcia to come with a wail before quickly pulling his fingers out and pushing into Reid with a quick thrust while he was distracted. Reid grunted when he noticed what Rossi had done and went straight back to seeing if he could make Garcia scream the second time.

“B-Blake” Hotch gasped as he thrust his hips up to meet her every movement, he was getting close. She kissed him desperately with teeth clashing and biting his lip as JJ spasmed with a soft groan and Morgan slowed his movements while she was oversensitive. Hotch pulled Blake’s head back and bit her shoulder to muffle his own groan as he stilled inside her.

“Morgan!” Blake called and they quickly moved together with Morgan above her while JJ sat up and nibbled at Penelope’s shoulder. Hotch removed the condom and dropped it in the bin before shuffling up a little to tentatively trail kisses along JJ’s abdomen. Her hand in his hair informed him that he was very welcome to do what he wanted and so he moved down slightly and gently licked her, thrusting his tongue in to taste more.

Reid was making noises in the back of his throat and wishing someone would just touch him. Blake rolled Morgan onto his back and he laughed and reached out to help Reid only to have his hand knocked away by Rossi who shook his head.

“He can come on my cock or not at all.” Rossi panted and Reid made a sound that was a truly miserable wail and Garcia gasped and moved her other hand to JJ’s hair just holding on as Reid did something particularly wicked with his teeth that pushed her over the edge with a yell that was almost a scream. Shuddering she lay panting as Rossi pulled Spencer up to his knees with an arm across the slender man’s chest. “Someone grab his arms.” Rossi asked and JJ reluctantly left Hotch and crawled over, placing her mouth on Spencer’s cock and letting his hand rest gently in her hair as he begged and then howled as he spurted down her throat seconds later. JJ pulled off Reid with a smirk and caught a drop she missed on one finger and pushed it into Reid’s mouth as Rossi pounded into him roughly.

Blake came at the image, trembling as Morgan rolled them again and quickly followed her with a few snaps of his hips. Hotch pulled Garcia over and she ducked her head to suck him back to an erection while he tried not to pull at her hair or thrust his hips up. Rossi came with roar and Spencer moaned at the erratic thrusts. When Rossi released him he fell forwards and watched as Morgan moved languidly to lie beside Rossi and kiss him lazily as they both came to a little.

“Penelope, may I?” Reid asked with surprising coherency and Hotch blushed at the way Reid had asked as though they were dancing or something. Garcia pulled off him and nodded so Reid straddled his lap and ground down with a smirk as Hotch’s eyes widened when he realised what Spencer wanted.

“Yes.” Hotch gasped and waved his hand until he found the foil packets but Reid shook his head and he stilled, confused.

“I’m clean, if you want.” Reid added shyly and Hotch took a second to process that he didn’t mean clean as in drugs but clean as in no diseases. When he managed that he just blinked. Garcia had moved to slide fingers into JJ who was making high sounds and Blake was moving Morgan out of her road so she could work Rossi back up again with her mouth. Reid obviously took this long pause as pure shock and helped by lining Hotch up and waiting for a small nod before he lowered himself with a moan.

“Hey Hotch.” Morgan grinned as he broke the kiss with Rossi. “Want to try something new?” He asked and Hotch nodded, apprehension and desire building as Morgan shimmied himself out from that knot of human bodies and Hotch decided he  was sick of people kneeling over him so before Morgan reached him he flipped Spencer so that he was on top making Reid moan and thrown his head back. Morgan knelt over Reid’s head and stroked Hotch’s face before guiding him down.

Penelope lifted her head to watch as Hotch slowed his hips and concentrated on tasting her chocolate Adonis. JJ cursed and wriggled to kissed Rossi drawing her main focus away but she kept her eyes open, watching as Reid scratched down Hotch’s back to try and make him move faster. Rossi snorted when Hotch reached one hand down to hold Reid by the neck, clearly squeezing just enough to make Reid gasp and tilt his head back further in invitation. Warning was very much not received.

Blake reached out and lightly traced her fingers up the inside of Reid’s foot humming when he twitched and tried to get away. Rossi cursed at the vibrations that sent through his lower half and decided that today was a day for miracles because he was too fucking old for this shit yet his dick was certainly happy for round two. Blake pulled off him with a satisfied smirk.

“Kitten.” Rossi decided looking straight at Penelope. “May I?” He asked as he rolled a condom on and Blake crawled over JJ and nodded at her so she lay down and spread her legs.

“Like it’s a question.” She teased and he draped himself over her, supporting himself with one arm as he slid into her body. He dropped his head to her chest and teased a nipple with his teeth before lightly thrusting and enjoying her gasps as hands grabbed at him.

Hotch finally started thrusting into Reid harder, the latter shifted his legs and crossed them tightly over Hotch’s hips. Blake shouted wordlessly as she froze above the blonde, quickly making JJ shout her name and the moved to cuddle and watch the others contentedly. Penelope was gasping into Rossi’s mouth as she rubbed her clit desperately and discovered that Rossi’s reputation was not just well earned but greatly understated.

“Hotch, please.” Reid was almost sobbing with need and Morgan drowned it out with a yell as he came in Hotch’s mouth. Hotch couldn’t swallow fast enough and a bit dripped down his chin and landed on Reid’s lips making the man moan and reach upwards despite the hand still around his neck. Morgan pulled away and Rossi pulled out of Garcia who needed a break.

Hotch growled down at Reid and moved his knees to hook over Hotch’s shoulders so he could bend the genius in half and fuck him exactly as hard as Reid wanted it. Reid threw his arms up to hold onto Blake clawing desperate at her calf as Hotch fucked him hard enough to move the bed and force any potential sounds out as little more than breathy mewls. Rossi pulled the condom off and stroked himself as he watched Blake wriggle down to whisper in Reid’s ear, clearly giving him ideas as her fingers danced over his lips and tighter around his neck and the others slipped into his mouth.

“Beg Reid.” Hotch grunted and Blake moved her hands lower to play over the pale chest and teased one of his nipples. Reid took a few tries to get words out and they were monosyllable and gasped with eyes wide open so he would never forget. Hotch just kept thrusting as the begging grew even more frantic and high pitch until Hotch barked out an order and Reid came with a scream torn from his throat and echoed in Hotch’s groan at the tightening muscles around his cock.

Gingerly he pulled out of Reid who was starting to go to sleep already. Rossi cleared his throat at pointed at his cock not really wanting to use his own hand for this. JJ looked to Hotch who disposed of the condom and knelt next to the small bin near the edge of the bed so Rossi scooted forward and groaned as Hotch showed him what he’d learned from Morgan which turned out to be quite a lot. JJ knelt behind Hotch whispering advice and guiding his head as Rossi lay back and enjoyed Hotch’s mouth with a gentle hand on Hotch’s head.

When Rossi felt Hotch take him deeper, into his throat, Rossi yelled and had to think of the ugliest person he could imagine to stop himself cumming just from that. JJ smirked and pushed Hotch to do it again and Rossi really wasn’t one for holding himself back, coming down Hotch’s throat with a groan. JJ helped Hotch up onto the bed and their boss leant over and kissed Rossi, making him taste himself and all Rossi could think of was the many times he’d been told to suck himself.

They all wriggled to fit on what they were just realising was a ridiculously large bed that could hold seven grown adults, however barely. Reid was draped over Morgan and Garcia was half off him while JJ settled herself over Hotch and Rossi while Blake wrapped a leg around Hotch and used his chest as a pillow.

 

“Hotchner.” Hotch answered the phone sleepily without realising he’d had to reach over bodies to get it but now that Strauss’ voice came through he was starting to register that fact.

“A number of agents were drugged with an unknown substance last night.” She was saying and Hotch carefully extracted himself from Blake and JJ who were naked on him and Rossi only to realise that Reid, Morgan and Penelope formed their own pile next to them.

“Why are you giving us the case?” He asked dumbly still trying to work out what the hell had happened.

“There is no case.  Have you experienced any symptoms?” She asked and Hotch nodded but realised he probably shouldn’t try and guess what had happened last night but a quick glance under the sheet confirmed that everyone was naked. Reid had a sock if that could count.

“What kind of symptoms?” He asked realising she couldn’t see his nodding.

“The culprit described it as a sex drug, increasing libido and stamina significantly. All agents infected so far were unable to avoid rather awkward encounters with other agents. Thankfully no outside reports have come in yet.” She sighed.

“I’ll call the rest of the team and find out.” He promised trying to sound honest.

“Thank you, I still have to call the B team and several junior agents who attended last night.” She sighed and Hotch almost felt sorry for her having to ask so many people if they had wild, unrestrained sex the previous night. Only almost.

“I’ll call you back once I find out.” He assured and they hung up and he spent a good minute freaking out internally before looking around for his boxers. When he couldn’t find them he borrowed a clean pair of Dave’s and decided that while creepy it was better than being completely naked. He shook Rossi and JJ awake first. “Strauss rang.” He said grimly as Rossi sleepily cuddled into the two women before realising there were two women, one of which was suddenly scrambling out of bed and Hotch held up a robe for her.

“Does anyone remember – why are you wearing my boxers?” Rossi cut his first question off for the second.

“I can’t find mine which raises several concerns. The first of which being the phone call I just received.” He tried to get them on track but Blake had properly woken up and was giggling at the other human pile. She reached out and poked Reid in the cheek, he groaned and froze, opening his eyes slowly and breathing a sigh of relief. He looked under him and fell out of bed in surprise and Hotch was there holding up a second robe which Reid quickly wrapped around him as Garcia and Morgan looked at each other and shrugged, staying cuddled together. Rossi rolled out and put a shirt and underwear on.

“Anyone remember last night?” Blake asked hopefully and Reid scrunched up his face.

“I’m hung over.” He decided grumpily and Morgan chuckled. “Coffee.” He demanded and Rossi figured he might be demanding but he had a damn good point.

“Asprins and water.” Rossi decided and led an entourage out to his kitchen, passing the living room and the rest of their clothes. He passed the white tablets around and glasses of water while Reid poked his coffee machine grumpily making his own.

“Strauss called to ask if we’d experienced the results of a sexual enchantment drug that apparently infected the party last night.” Hotch decided and Rossi snorted at the idea of her having to call people about that. Hotch smiled slightly sharing the sentiment. Reid stretched with a moan.

“Well I certainly had sexual intercourse. If no one minds I’m going back to bed.” He said almost sculling the first cup of super sweet coffee and pouring another.

“Stay, we need to talk about this.” Blake said and Reid looked at the seats before leaning against the bench with a wince.

“I didn’t know you were into guys.” JJ teased to lighten the mood a little and Reid shrugged. The movement upset the robe which fell open at the chest and everyone gasped.

“What?” Reid demanded.

“Your neck.” Hotch said angrily and Reid turned to look in the glass of a cabinet and tenderly touch his neck.

“Hmm, someone was rough too.” He said and started looking for the memories. They would be there but if they had been drugged they might be hazy or hard to remember.

“You don’t think it was one of us?” Morgan asked feeling a little sick and not just because he’d drinking too much the night before.  Reid flapped a hand as he called up memories of last night.

“Morgan decided I was drunk and we left the party but Rossi invited us over.” Reid said starting at the easy to remember spot. “I think we were flirting in the car and I suggested we play a game. Garcia suggested ‘Never Have I Ever’ but Hotch said I was too drunk so Garcia suggested we do dares or drink.” Reid spoke slowly pulling the memory up and making sure it was all in order.

“That sounds fun.” Morgan said and winced before realising that as Reid spoke the memories floated up in his own mind. “Actually I remember that.” He said and everyone hummed and nodded.

“I assume I gave you vodka.” Rossi said having seen the bottle before and Reid nodded. “I don’t remember what next.”

“We went around and if you never remember that game I’ll be very happy.” Reid said blushing as he remembered what he’d done. He proceeded to explain the night as quickly as he could, and then he and Blake spent twenty minutes convincing Hotch that he didn’t have to feel bad for the bruises. Hotch eventually called Strauss to say no one reported anything strange and they decided to keep it a secret. The unsub who had been accidentally caught by his own drug had been caught and the entire event was over. Well, mostly. The team would certainly enjoy memories of that night in private.


End file.
